WMW issue #12: Meet Neha D'Souza, Media Director and mum to 2 boys
"Let go of the ‘mom guilt’ and work again"
Last week felt incredibly long. I’m not sure if that’s because we were too busy, or not busy enough!
This week’s working mum wisdom (WMW) comes from Neha D’Souza who works at a media agency we work with. I have never met Neha, however we have spoken many times and I feel like I know her quite well, even more so after this interview :)
Neha is highly competent and her work ethic is outstanding. When I work with her on a campaign, I know I can rely on her to deliver more than expected.
Her super efficient work culture made me wonder how she juggles it all with her life as a mum and at home, and I am so happy she agreed to participate in this interview.
I continue to be humbled by all the amazing mums I connect with thanks to this newsletter!
Q. Tell us a little bit about yourself
My name is Neha and I landed in Dubai 17 years ago. Although it wasn’t the plan to stay more than 5 years, Dubai has given me a lot of things to keep me here – a good life, a good job, security and stability. I live here with my husband, father-in-law and 2 kids.
On the professional front, I started my career with Bennett & Colemen LTD (Times of India) in Mumbai as an executive and after working with them for 2 years, I realized that advertising and media is where I belong; so that gave a start to my advertising journey – though it hasn’t been an easy one but today when I look back, it was all worth it.
Talking about my hobbies or passion, I never developed any as such – not sure I can blame the time here or if I was just lazy 😉. One thing that we as a family really enjoy is to travel. We do make it a point to explore a new destination at least once a year. Thanks to Covid though, we haven’t been able to do so for the last 2 years.
Q. You are a mum of 2 boys (11 and 6), work full time in a media house and just got promoted to director (yay!) How do you do it all?!
My one line answer to this would be – I DON’T KNOW.
It gets hectic and crazy; sometimes even out of control. Managing two naughty boys, their school, studies, my job and home duties, life is definitely not a bed of roses for me. Striking a work-family balance is not only hard but also very challenging. The most crucial thing is that your spouse needs to be supportive here and I’m lucky to have one who is.
Q. What is your ultimate goal as a working mum?
I want to focus on the positive things that my work life is contributing to my family. I want to be optimistic and confident that I’m making the best choice not only for my whole family, but for myself and my kids who will understand the extent of my love and the sacrifice I make.
Q. What is the biggest challenge you face as a working mum, and how are you trying to overcome it?
Giving my kids enough time is my biggest challenge and worry. The elder one is heading into his teens and younger one has started primary school. This is the time when they need us the most – to talk, to share, to understand their feelings and discuss the situations they find themselves in. Since my weekdays get busy, my weekends are for family.
Q. Where do you get your inspiration?
Inspiration comes in different forms. Sometimes, it’s a friend who shares a bit of her story, sometimes reading such amazing blogs like this one - which is a living proof that so many working mums are doing their best to maintain a balance between work and family life; and sometimes just by watching a movie on “working moms”. There are plenty of sources that can give you that kick you need to keep moving forward.
Q. What is your best productivity hack?
Focus on a list of specific tasks each day that are manageable and won’t make you feel completely burnt out!
Q. What is your parenting mantra?
There is NO mantra. There is NO set of rules that you need to follow as a parent. No one is perfect and we all learn as we grow. This is what I have understood from my motherhood. We make mistakes and we learn as we go along.
Q. What do you do in your 'me-time' and how does it help you?
Me-time = Netflix. Since I take the train to work and it is more than an hour ride one way, I love to catch up on my Netflix series.
Q. Did becoming a mother change the way you work? How so?
Being a mother changed me completely. Every decision or choice is made with the kids in mind. To carry the extra responsibilities as a mother is a lot and often challenging because all I want to do is put my best foot forward - be it at work or home, but it is not always achievable.
Q. What is your advice to new mums looking to start working again?
Let go of the ‘mom guilt’ and work again. It will give you a feeling of being whole – as an individual and as a mom.
Q. Favourite tool that makes your life easier?
Trust in that supreme power above who always watches over me.
Q. Parenting book / advice that was a game changer for you?
There was never a need to read a book on parenting. There were so many elderly people in the family to guide me at every step of my way but for those who don’t have this privilege, follow your heart because only you know what’s best for your child.
Q. Favourite quote
“The journey isn’t linear, nor it is meant to be….
Q. Best thing you have read or watched lately
I recently read a book called “How psychology works”. It is a great read as it helps you understand different moods and behaviors people experience in multiple situations. It discusses how the effects of chemical reactions and their overlap in our brains can affect people in the way they deal with things. It was quite helpful as you can relate to them to real-life situations.
If you enjoyed this and feel someone else can benefit from this conversation or this community, please share!
If you have any questions or comments for Neha, do leave a comment here or hit reply and I will make sure she gets your message.
Have a great week!
Love,
Abha